A Saturday morning, blind, silent and wonderfully out of any thought that had crossed my head 12 hours ago, while I was returning from my usual work. A week free of joy, nevertheless full of hope, though. Cause you see, you get up in the morning and you hit for your workplace and say “…today I will do my best to become what I always dreamt of, to make a difference, to be better as I was thought to, to be kinder with everyone around me”. Purpose of our decent lives. Still, you get to your workplace and find out how nothing is supposed to be and you look around, even in a larger circle-like geometry and alas, you find out how actually really nothing around you is like it was supposed to be. You read newspapers, you talk with people, you listen to them, close or remote friends, intimate buddies or just contextual. You look at tv – national private stations , business-focused, of course- and even further, you are hit with dozens of sterility, lies, corporate blah-blah, intellectuals without a proper country and analysts without a clue. And once more, you feel small, powerless, clueless and, because you have been taught to look ahead and survive, you also feel full of hope.
And it is Saturday morning and you do that. You get up and say to your beloved one, let’s go to the seaside. And you go, 2 hours crazy driven on the highway- which really starts to get damaged more and more (and I heard THEY want to put a 5 euros tax on it). No problem, one more tax on our patient and string shoulders. And there is the sea, blue to black (there is a reason they called it black sea), intense and calm, with an April sun warming up the cliffs and caressing your winter-stroke paleness of your skin.
And instantly, Bucharest disappeared, companies and their strategies have been left behind, inert-faced people of the city are not around, crisis is just a word in others’ drained minds, and you begin to breathe the salty air and to exhaustless run in the still-chill sand. For somebody who would trade any city and lifestyle for a privately-owned sea shore, no matter the shore, sea has always been the medicine for everything.
Is sadness or happiness contextual or it just depends on our true nature? When you see how everything crushes or melts in a filthy swamp of top-governed incompetence, lack of the slightest leadership, how we just linger and wait for something is not in out true powers, the human happiness concept become a word of philosophy and not a human state desirable to reach? For somebody who doesn’t needs fancy-trendy-looks or cosmopolite visions on how the life should be, a bit of salty sea and sun, a bit of walking around and a coffee drank under the cozy sun near the shore is the ultimate happiness. The same would be sitting on a terrace in a mountain’s resort. But to get there you need to fight with a traffic, with the look-alike mad and innocently-stupid drivers. I am not willing to pay this price and I counted on the fact that sea will be more welcoming and out of visitors than mountain resorts.
Really, in my own country I feel happier without (some) people around? Apart from their- mine also- daily problems and complains? Apart from my own regular life, I feel more happy and truly living? What is then the purpose of living the other 5 days of the week? I guess it is more and more challenging to find the motivation within itself and to say “tomorrow will be better”. Tomorrow and today are not happy that all and sadly, I see how I am buried in a whole of nothing 5 days a week. And living the other two, happily. I see people who strive of finding sweet short happy moments in every day of their lives, but if you are strongly-related to the reality surrounding like a too-tight belt, the shorts moments of happiness are like molecules of fresh water in the desert. And it is a long journey until you reach an oasis and the camels you are riding are somehow ill and guideless. What can we do and actually, what can we do more??!!
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